Halloween has always been a confusing time of year. This year however has been especially hectic, since it’s right after mercury has been in retrograde I assume. Not only do I have the terribly difficult decision of what to dress like for Halloween but I had to decided whether or not to be here or on the west coast, to tussle with the law or naught, etc. etc. 

Unfortunately I still have not arrived at  a conclusion on what to be for Halloween. A leprechaun? Already did it. As well as an Indian (twice), Pippi Longstockings (i had hangers in my hair), a King? (I was Louis the !V, that’s what Catholic All Hollows Eve will do to ya) . . . I’m fresh out of Ideas. 

Maybe Peter Pan? Or Captain Hook? … I feel an scheme comin’ on……

BBC 22’s have been the official drink of the week. A winter alcoholic doesn’t really count right? Not as a real, live alcoholic, just a seasonal one. Yes, that’s good. 

 

Seasonal Alcoholic >>>>>>>>>>>> :

This MAY or MAY NOT be a Samoan that founds it’s way into my humble little abode….

But it most definitely consumed a few jugs of guido’s orange juice, quite a bit of brie, a snippet of salmon, and any dark tasty beer in sight. Maybe they don’t have that where it comes from? Lock up your elegant foods good people of Berkshire County, this lil mama is on the loose….

Rental possibility for west bound tour. however the gas milage on this asian is up there. considering other options.

If someone shits in the woods, does anyone hear it?

This MAY or MAY NOT be an unidentifiable individual leaving the makeshift toilet paper embarrassingly  trailing out of the ass after taking a dump in the woods…

In honor of labor day now being the united states most recent addition to the list of ironic holidays we celebrate considering the unemployment rate is at its highest since 1983 i’m here to remind you that you fuckin patsys still have good reason to guiltlessly and repetedly mash g-ma’s potato salad into all of your face holes in a celebratory frenzy. The economic rebound may be well on the rise thanks to the jobs that are always hiring and never firing! such as:

Whiskey Ambassador- Hone your whiskey drinking skills and get paid while doing so. and who the hell would be stupid enough to pass up that kind of bad ass title. whiskey ambassador? talk about street cred.

Chicken Sexer- basically just find the chicks with dicks and put them in the left crate. (has anybody actually ever seen a penis on a chicken? or a rooster rather. even so. can i get a raise of hands?)

Tampon Tester- Absorbency and cord strength testing for any women shameless enough to insert dry cotton into their vags all day.

Flatulence smell reduction underwear maker- you make underwear that keep peoples farts inside the fabricso they get rashes and eventually their butts fall off.

Further fear no more- also adding more stress on the economic struggle is the difficulty for people to dole out their hard earned cash on just anything- but with much research i’ve also found the most economical and sensible purchase. and thanks to me i’ve found your best deal after comparing a few quotes. you’re welcome. Any questions ask the supervisor shown below.

kolbe is either going to kill me or love me for this post.

The last days of summer must be savored.

Yes, i’m saying it- summer is drawing to a close. The days of festis, gettin wasted in our beautiful fields, swims in the wee hours of the morning, stumbling to bed at 6am after rolling up and down kp- and being chased away by the ever-so-vigilent Lenox police force are coming to a end.

So now we godda start the whompin’ indoors- get wasted by bonfires, break out the sleds and boards, and start boozin’ and cruisin’ through the storm.

Berkshire County mofos

Why the fuck do people get depressed over season changing? It only happens in about 1/2 the country- enjoy it.

This MAY or MAY NOT be myself, Natalie, demonstrating that it’s true – the bigger the hair the closer to God.

Once again i’m pretty sure it’s not.

This MAY or MAY NOT be us digging for our wits. Probably not. But whoever it may be it’s as clear as day that they’re the illest most sick heady ballers around…..brah.

Boredom? Say what?

What is that shit anyway? How do we always get suckered into the gravity of its charm? Bored- it’s the worst thing you can be. [Next to a vampire in the inner city circa 1986. or Africa. Imagine the severity of that embarrassment?! Karma reach around baby. AIDS aint nuthin' to fuck wit.] Keep those gears rotating honeylambs. DO SOMETHING. time’s a wastin’. Those thumbs can’t twiddle themselves…you’ve got your mind for that remember? Turn the auto pilot off and put your thinker to good use. In the meantime feast your eyes on these babies:

This MAYor MAY NOT be us doing our everyday G thing cruisin’ n’ bruisin’  on some dope low-rider we jacked in the disreputable ghetto of Lenox.